If you haven’t read Dr. Henry Cloud’s book, “Boundaries,” you should…it’s a fantastic read and was a game changer in my life.
I’ll break down the gist of the book for you: You’ve got to set limitations with yourself, those around you and those you serve.
Several years ago, I was trying to balance babies, a mother-in-law who lived with us for health reasons (and needed a lot of care), my job, my side hustle, I helped build my husband’s practice…I’m sure I’m missing something, but you get the point.
It was a LOT of things. I never said no to anyone…I prided myself on “doing it all.”
The problem with that was I never made time for me. After years of the chaos, I was burned out big time.
Have you ever felt this way?
Setting boundaries is hard work and can sometimes require courageous conversations.
After I learned more about boundaries, I took Dr. Cloud’s recommendations and started setting some of my own. I remember having a conversation with my boss at the time and told her that I wasn’t available between the hours of 6-8pm to answer texts and emails. Why? My children needed my attention, and I needed to be a mom during those times.
Years ago, I told family that we were going to limit trips to their home because they didn’t have enough beds and I ended up sleeping on the floor…my back hurt and I was always in a bad mood because of the lack of sleep.
When I’m working with clients, I let THEM know of my availability and we schedule around it. I’m not available 24-7. I have kids. I have a life, and I now have control of my schedule.
I also have learned to “train” my clients. For example, on my Google calendar, I block out the time chunks that are for me or the kids. Since my calendar is connected to my website on calendly, clients who want to book time can see my availability. If I don’t schedule MY time chunks, then I no longer own my calendar – it owns me.
I abide by my 2-minute rule when it comes to email. If I can answer an email under 2 minutes, I’ll do so immediately. Those emails that require a lot more time and attention, I’ll let a client know when to expect my response.
If I receive an email at 3pm on a Friday afternoon, I will NOT spend the rest of my afternoon answering client issues (unless it’s an emergency, of course)…I’ll let them know when to expect an appropriate response.
Think about how you can set boundaries in your life…and it’ll absolutely, 100% change your life for the better.